The Big Bang Theory

Nah, man!  I'm not talking about the thing that kids at my junior high had permission from their parents to "opt out" of in Earth Science class because they found mentions of evolution "offensive" (although I could always touch on that subject later here because I always wondered how those same parents explained "The Land Before Time" to their child - unless, of course, that was banned too.  Look, excuse me, but how can you ban Little Foot?  Heartless.).

No, I'm talking about the great "bangs" versus "fringe" debate.

Still clueless?

Check out this pic of beloved Gaga here.  Besides being bonkers, what would you call that great, sweeping mass of hair across her forehead?  If you say "bangs", then you're American.  "Fringe", British.

I can tell you right now, of all the words that differ from the British vocabulary, I've never found one that warranted more adamant opinions than 'bangs'.

"Mmm ... I think I need to get my bangs trimmed," I said to my (English) colleague, blowing my bangs out of my face.  'Cause, you know, I couldn't see the forest through the trees and all that.

"Your wahhht?" she asked, incredulously.  I sighed and turned to her.  "My fringe.  I need to get my fringe trimmed," I said.   I turned back to my computer.  Silence ensued for a while as we continued our work.  After a few minutes, she emitted a chuckle and shook her head.  "Bangs," she muttered to herself softly. 

"Yes, why do you call them bangs?" asked John suddenly when I made a similar comment to him after arriving home that night.  "It's fringe.  You know, because it's a fringe around your face?  'Bangs' don't even make any sense.  I mean, what is a bang, singular?"  "Well I don't know," I snapped at him.  "It could be called curtains for all I know because right now it's shielding me from you and your relentless questions."  He ignored my attitude.  "Be-yang," he repeated to himself, trying to mimic my accent.  I shot him a death glare.

The next day, I booked myself in for a fringe trim.


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