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I'm not even sure where to begin.
Yesterday, before my friends left, the sun was out: consistent and strong. This morning, they were gone: the rain started and just wouldn't stop. Last night, I returned home to an empty flat, though it'd just been filled with side-splitting laughter and crowded (though tidy!) with suitcases and new purchases the day before.
After my parents' first visit to London, I spent an hour scouring the flat after they left for evidence of their stay - a crumpled receipt, a forgotten toiletry, a misplaced charger, perhaps ... anything tangible enough to trigger the memory of their presence.
And that's what I did last night: I scoured the flat in the same way, wanting to preserve the memory of laughter, of joy, of friendship. Of course, there are always photos; a journal I kept of all our favorite (and funniest) moments; and memories of the time spent at the end of each day "airdropping" photos between iPhones. But the days passed like a blur, and all I have are the photos to remind me that it all really did happen - that my friends (including my first-year college roommate!) travelled from three corners of the US (San Diego, Houston, and Madison) for a reunion in London.
The Friday after they arrived, we had coffees and arepas at one of my favorite local haunts, Arepa & Co., on the canal in Haggerston, before heading to Buckingham Palace. Can I just tell you how refreshing it is to see London through a visitor's eyes? I can't remember the last time I walked down The Mall.
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It didn't take long for us to find ourselves in fits of laughter and I, snapping a photo at just the right time, caught two of my friends bent over double in hysterics, with the other gesturing behind her in a who-are-these-people stare. It quickly became "The Photo" of our time together.
From there, we headed to Fortnum & Mason (my spiritual home!), where we indulged in some retail therapy (Kara bought a gorgeous Smythson journal) and I ogled handbags and bracelets that were much too far out of my price range.
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(Aren't these Halcyon Days bracelets beautiful? I think I need to start my collection ...)
I fell in love with this beautiful biscuit tin/money box and ... when my back was turned ... (which seems to be a reoccuring trend!) it was purchased for me.
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We finished with afternoon tea and a bottle of prosecco at The Criterion, as we re-hashed the funny moments of the hours before and reminisced about the last time we saw each other, which was at my wedding reception in Seattle two years ago.
Seeing these kinds of friends again - these "best" friends - is like saying, "So, anyway ..." Everything in-between those moments when we're not together is just a breath, a pause. And although I have wonderful, dear, close friends in London, I just miss those friends who know me. Like, really know me.
I miss having friends nearby who make me feel like nothing else in the world matters - like we have a secret that only we're in on.
Don't you?
I couldn't agree with everything you said in this post more! Good friends are priceless :) And the Criterion is a winner ;) Lots of love, Andrea xxx
ReplyDeletewww.andreaspassions.com
Love the Criterion, Andrea! Used to go there for dinner as a treat but haven't been back for ages ... forgot how gorgeous the ceiling is there! Thanks for stopping by xo
DeleteI have three lifelong friends (they are brothers); they know me inside out, they tease me, we pick up where we left off and I love them as though they are actually my brothers.
ReplyDeleteHappy to hear you had a great time and it's always fun viewing London through the eyes of visitors (and of course, The Mall looks terrific when the flags are out and the sun is shining).
That's so lovely, Ruth. Those kinds of friendships are the most special kinds.
DeleteSounds like you had an amazing time with your friends, it's funny how we can not see people in years but when you do, it's like you've never been apart. Arepa & Co sounds like a lovely restaurant.
ReplyDeleteSuze | LuxuryColumnist
Absolutely, Suze! And yes, Arepa & Co. is one of my favorite local haunts ... I end up there far too often!
DeleteYes, more than anything. Because the thing is, friends like that don't come around often. I had an amazing group of friends in New York and I remember bawling my eyes out a couple of months after I arrived in London because I realized that "we" would never be together in the same way again, and that that period in my life is over. God, it can be so hard, can't it?
ReplyDeleteUgh, I hated this post ... everything I wrote seemed so cliched and ineffective in attempting to explain what kind of friendship I have with those friends. I basically summed it up like, "Everyone else is stupid". Eloquent, right??
DeleteI love this post Jaime, and I love the fact that you have people in your life that you miss that much after a few hours! Might seem like a strange thing to say, but I think it's always nice to hear that people have such close friends. From your Instagram it looks like you had a wonderful time - I can't wait to read about all the fun things you got up to! Better to have friends and to miss them, than to not have them at all, right?
ReplyDeleteLauren xx | The Lifestyle Diaries
Aw, thank you, sweet Lauren!! Yes, absolutely better to have them in my life and miss them ... rather than not have them at all. I'm so lucky xx
DeleteSuch a beautifully written post. I know it's not the same thing but when I was 21 I moved up to Leeds to do a Masters for a year. I didn't know anyone there and though I made friends it wasn't the same as the bonds I had with my school friends and university friends. I remember my best friend coming to visit for my birthday and me never wanting her to leave...and then crying when she did. I'm someone that gets my energy from people I love, and it's so amazing to have these people in your life.
ReplyDeleteLots of love,
Angie
I can *totally* relate Angie, and it's almost scary how much we have in common! I moved to York to do a Masters for a year and I had the EXACT same experience. I am such a social person, but no matter how hard I tried, I didn't make that many friends during my first few months there, and I was MISERABLE. The graduate program was really separate from campus and from the undergraduates, so I felt really isolated. To make matters worse, John had moved to Paris. So we barely ever saw each other. It was a difficult year, but it taught me a lot about myself and about perseverance, as well.
DeleteI love your comment about getting your energy from people you love. I'm the same way.
Hugs xx
Sent your post to my besties also scattered across the USA. Sigh! So true!!! Made me miss them and their visits. So glad you got a dose of old friends. It truly revives the soul.
ReplyDeleteAw, thank you for sharing, Valerie! Couldn't have said it better myself - truly soul-reviving. xo
DeleteUtterly priceless.
ReplyDeleteThank you, lovely xx
DeleteSounds like you made some more once in a lifetime memories this past week. I completely feel for you, and know how hard it is after people leave...#expatproblems...I always think of the Winnie the Pooh quote "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard" (completely cheesy, but cheers me up every time!!!).
ReplyDeletePolly xx
Follow Your Sunshine
Oh man, that Winnie the Pooh quote, Polly! Cheered you up, teared me up (in a good way)! But yes, we are so, so lucky. I need to have that quote framed somewhere. xx
DeleteOh Jaime, I really feel for the heart sink feeling when they left. I have a group of friends from high school who I feel that way about and even though we see each other together infrequently but whenever we do, we're always up till the 2-3 am ,not dancing or going out but just on our pyjamas talking and picking up where we left off. I really hope you get to see them all again soon.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you can relate, Shikha, and to know that you've got friends like mine too ... the best friends are those you can't wait to stay up until 2-3 a.m. chatting and laughing with! x
DeleteYes, yes and YES. I've just returned from my best friend's wedding in Italy, although she lives in Australia. It was pretty jarring knowing that she was not only getting married but that this is it. She is never coming back. It hurts and it sucks and I know she feels some of that too, despite being blissfully happy. I love how you explain the pause between seeing each other, it's so spot on. I'm so pleased that you had an amazing time with your girls.
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charliedistracted.com
Ugh, that is so tough, Charlie - I really feel for you. You know, it's the time zones that I find the most difficult. Sometimes, just hopping on Facetime or email helps, but with friends being so far ahead/behind, it's just too hard to have phone conversations whenever you want. Sigh. I just have to remember to be grateful for the memories we had! x
DeleteThis made me feel sad. My bestie moved away 6 years ago and is currently in Canada. With me in various places around the world we've barely managed to see each other over the last few years. We still Whatsapp every day, but we miss cocktails, and pyjama parties and shopping together. So what I'm trying to say is, I really get this sadness you felt. I'm glad you had such a wonderful time together and made plenty more memories to keep you going until next time.
ReplyDeleteOh no! That's really tough, Amy. I think it's the physical absence that's the hardest to cope with. Like you said, the pajama parties, shopping, cocktails ... but yes, we all need to those little "booster" visits, whenever we can manage to have them, in order to sustain us until our next meeting!
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